Chapter 74
GABRIEL (continued…)
That night, I called Sophia for the first time since arriving home I went in for a quick shower, and called her while getting dressed for bed. She picked up, but seemed so distant… like there was something playing on her mind.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Freckles?” I asked for the fourth time in that one conversation. I am still seeing you tomorrow, right?”
“Hmm..” She buzzes a little sleepily, but mostly she was just distracted. “How’s your work emergency thing going?”
“Bad,” I reply, truthfully. Alister had colorectal cancer. I was planning on picking Sophia up tomorrow, but instead, I’d have to take a trip to his doctor. To tell her this was on the tip of my tongue, but only the promise I had hastily made to my grandfather before leaving- the one to not tell this to anyone until he tells it to my grandmother in person this weekend- stopped me. Besides, Sophia just lost her Grandpa to cancer. I doubted she wanted more cancer news, “Why do you soundl so busy?”
“I’m not. I was just almost asleep when you called.”
“Oh, sorry, Freckles.” I say with no remorse, a sihall smile making its way to my lips. I needed to hear her voice.
“That’s okay.” She stays quiet for a few seconds before adding, “Are you at home?”
Tam
“Are you going to sleep now?”
‘Soon, I tell her, yawning.
‘Hm. Okay. Goodnight, Gabriel.
“Goodnight, Freckles.”
I miss you, I wanted to add, but didn’t, partly because it was too cheesy, more than I’d ever been, and partly because she disconnected the call so quietly after I said goodnight, you’d think her hand was burning from holding the phone.
I conclude I was thinking too much into it.
Looking at my room, my bed- it was my sanctuary all these years, which was why I never even asked Lily to move in wi me. But now, it was filled with reminders of Freckles. Her scent, her vanity, her clothes, even the ones lying on the bed.
I wasn’t going to be able to sleep tonight, I realise, not without her next to me.
I picked up my laptop and quietly left to my office; might as well work if I can’t sleep.
Disappointment hit me like a truck when Freckles told me she wasn’t coming back home, that she needed a few more days to bask in the memory of her grandfather before she could leave her hometown, unsure when she’d think she had the courage to return.
I understood, of course, but this nagging feeling that something was wrong wouldn’t leave me alone.
I was sore from falling asleep while working, but I’d done this too many times before Freckles entered my life to worry about it now. I talked to her again in the morning, told her I was at work, and made sure she was okay. She sounded better to
me.
1/3
I couldn’t concentrate on wark either. There was something dooming playing in my mind.
I slipped out before most of my employees were in, showering at home and collecting my grandfather’s cancer reports from Dr. Grant who was busy and couldn’t see me.
That evening. I flew to Chicago, where one of the most famous oncologists in the country was based. He knew my grandfather because Alister called him for a second opinion on Jim’s health so many times.
He confirmed the same things that Alister said, of it still being in the first stage, where it would be easy to control preferably without radiations that would kill him.
Before I flew back, I called Sophia, who didn’t pick up. I waited minutes, but my heart was beating louder with every passing second. So, I called my grandmother, who told me Sophia was asleep.
She asked me where she was, and I said work. The lie sat heavy on my chest that
night.
The next evening. I met Lily’s Uncle. He not only agreed to meeting me in an informal setting, but insisted on it. Ten minutes down, here’s what I knew so far: One, he passed his hand through his blonde hair very often. Two, he said ‘well’ every time he went on to explain a concept I didn’t know. And three, he was good at his job.
Towards the end, he had convinced me that my grandfather would be okay. He had explained the treatment plan, and been honest about the side effects.
I stayed there alone in the cafe a bit after he left, lost in my thoughts. I considered myself good with secrets, but all I felt was the urge was to talk about this to someone, that someone being my Freckles
So I called her, heard her voice, heard her tell me she was doing fine, but none of that was enough. I wanted her to come back home. If she doesn’t, I would go to her tomorrow and bring her back with me whenever she was ready. I toy with that idea while playing with my phone when I heard a light sound. Taken out of my thoughts, I looked up at Lily sitting in front of me, the rim of her eyes red
My eyebrows furrowed. “What’re you doing here?”
“I had to track you down since you wouldn’t pick up my calls.” She replied making herself more comfortable, her voice
toneless.
“You called?” I blinked.
“No.” She raised her shoulders, “But if I did, would you have picked up?”
I stay silent. I would’ve told her that my grandfather did call from her phone and I did pick up the second time, but I
silent.
“Thought so.” The hurt that flashed across her face was quick, and she was quicker to hide it.
“What’re you doing here? How did you even know I was here?” I ask, and then it dawns. “Ah, your uncle.”
“He doesn’t know. I followed him here when I overheard him talk to you in the morning at breakfast.”
I blink my annoyance away.
“I waited, Gabriel. She raises her shoulders again in a tired, helpless shrug. “It’s been six months. I stayed away, I waited. Can you come back to me now?”
“Lily,” I begin, reminding myself that she was a victim of the st*pidity I had done, that she didn’t deserve my anger.
“Just yes or no, Gabriel. Please.”
Chapter 74
I take a deep breath. “No-
“You’re staying with her?”
“She’s my wife,” I nod.
“Do you love her?” I think she was about to cry.
“Do you want me to be honest?” I asked.
She pursed her lips, and then nods.
“I didn’t plan on it happening, really. She was a means to an end. But before I knew it, everything in my life revolved around her. It was the most maddening, frustrating punishment I had experienced- to not want a woman, yet to want her so much that you can’t think straight when she’s not around. You can’t think straight when she is around either, because you are so bewitched by everything about her- her scent, her touch, her voice, her smile. Sometimes, it feels like someone stole all the stars in the night sky and filled them in her eyes, and they shine only when she looks at me, and how can anyone not be enchanted by that?”
Lily blinks, and then she gulps. “Thank you for being honest with me.”
“I am really, really sorry” I say, meaning it. “I hope you find someone who makes you feel the same.”
The corner of her lips lift. “Oh, I will.”
I nod. “Take care, Lil”
I was about to leave, when she adds: “That’s your phone.”
“Oh, thanks.” I reach out to her side, grabbing it from her hands and then leave.
I don’t realise how tired I really was till I reached home and head to Freckles’ old room, the one that still carried her scent so strongly it made me wonder if she’d stayed in my room at all in the past few months. It felt more like her, with her paintings every where and the big closet a mess. I slept there that night, erigulfed by everything that reminded me of her
