Chapter 36
MIRABELLA
I exhale a breath through my mouth as I come awake from an exhausting slumber. My eyes part open but remain in a narrowed slit as i gulp down my saliva to wet my throat
I
My head is engulfed in a pang of pain as I attempt recalling the events of last night. “Matteo?” A whooshed whisper escapes my pained throat and I wince.
“Mrs. Denaro? I’m Beth, your nurse.” She quickly checks my pulse and with a sigh of relief, she asks, “How do you feel?”
“Where’s Matteo?” I throw a question right back at her, stammering and wincing through each word.
“Mr. Denaro is not here at the moment ma’am.” She answers politely.
“Please call
me Mirabella.” The nurse–Beth–offers me a tight nod in agreement. “Did he come to see n me? My husband I mean.”
Her eyes light, her lips stretching into an ear to ear grin, “of course!” She excitedly squeal with a tiny jump.
oh.
This one’s a sucker for romance.
“He didn’t leave your side even for a second.” I look at her with narrowed eyes, confused as to why he chooses to be there when I’m unconscious but decides to disappear when I’m fully awake.
“He thought to go grab your favorite snacks so that you have something to eat once you’re awake! Isn’t that so cute?! I see how everyone in this house shit in their pants whenever he walks by but he’s so soft for you.”
Bitch shut the f*ck up before I shove a grenade down your throat.
I roll my eyes.
As if on cue, Matteo walks in with a large food tray in hand but his movement is halted when both our eyes lock.
I prop myself up by my elbows, my mouth dropping open as search for the right words to say. My eyes brim with tears and my lips become parched. “Matteo…” I unexpectedly whisper and Matteo’s fists tighten around the food tray so tight that his knuckles pale..
He stares at me with all the wrong emotions; pity, confusion, regret, every emotion that I detest. But there’s a glint of softness in his eyes… “Matteo?” I call out again with my voice still in a whisper and a shuddered breath wracks through him as his hands tremble slightly.
Pablo walks in almost immediately and stands by a comer, observing the intense stare down battle going on between my husband and I.
“I’ll take that.” Pablo abruptly declares, taking the food tray from Matteo’s hands with a nod of understanding.
“Matteol Please don’t go!” I scream after the retreating back of my husband. He doesn’t want me anymore. He hates me. He’s disgusted by me. I thrash my head and sob.
Why did I give him a chance?
Why did I let him in?
Now I’m hurting and he’s nowhere to be seen but what is more painful is my inability to walk away from him; iny inability to take my heart
Chapter 36
back.
He took my heart hostage and he’s escaping with that part of me.
It hurts.
So bad.
I grab the food tray from Pablo and begin stuffing my mouth with food. At least he made to me, he touched it and if this is my only way of
getting one step closer to him, then I’m ready to eat myself to death.
“That’s enough Mirabella,” Pablo declares as he takes the food tray off my lap, handing it over to the nurse, ordering her to take it back to the
kitchen.
My body vibrates as I choke out each heart wrenching sob with my tears flowing like a river. “It hurts. My whole body hurts. My heart hurts.” I admit and Pablo’s large arms circle around me, engulfing me in a comfortable hug.
Why me?
What did I do to deserve this?
Pain after pain
Struggle after struggle..
Loss
as after loss.
“I know Mirabella. Give it time. I’m so sorry, so sorry that I cannot do anything for you.” Pablo whispers into n
my hair.
scream my sob. “Pablo! of what use am I? I cannot walk, I can barely talk properly. I couldn’t even protect my baby.” I sniffle and sniffle some more. “Did you know that I had just discovered my pregnancy that day? Why can’t I have any good thing in my life? They didn’t even let me hear my baby’s heartbeat! Why?!”
I fist Pablos shirt, my teeth sinking into his shoulder as my tears and drool wet up his shirt.
“Oh…Mirabella.” That’s all Pablo says and holds me still for long minutes.
I appreciate him for not asking me to stop crying, I appreciate him for not lying and telling me that everything will be fine, most of all, i appreciate him for being here for me.
He’s my saving grace during my breaking point.
After hours of crying and thrashing myself, Pablo wheels me into the art studio so that I can be introduced to my psychotherapist only I’d have never guessed it to be Ares.
I swallow loudly, my eyes widening when Ares’s masculine figure comes into sight with his gray orbs boring into mine and a professional smile playing at his lips.
“You’re good to be alone with him? We had requested for a female therapist, I’m sure there must have been some mixup somewhere.” Pablo blurts whilst looking at Ares accusingly.
I swallow hard again, “-it its fine.” I choke out.
12.18 Sat, 22 Jun
Chapter 36
Pablo hums and steps outside the door, shutting it behind him. “What in God’s name are you doing in here Ares! Are you trying to get killed?”
Ares let out a low chuckle, “hello to you too Mirabella. I missed you so much.”
Why does this boy never listen!
“I heard about the attack on the Denaro’s and also about the death of Ernesto Denaro.” He starts taking calculated steps toward me as though trying not to rile me up. “Then I heard a rumor that his daughter in law was with him when he was attacked and that she was in the
hospital.”
He falls to his knees in front of me and his hands begin massaging my left ankle as he continues speaking, “I didn’t have a choice, I had to hack into the hospital’s system to be sure you were okay. I needed to be certain that nothing happened to my best friend but when I saw…
Ares’s eyes slowly glides across my body until we hold each other’s stare with tears streaming down both our faces. “Christ, Mirabella,” More
tears spew from his eyes.
“Don’t.” I murmur, “Ares please don’t.”
He nods, still struggling to remain calm and collected for me.
“You don’t need therapy right now Mirabella. You don’t need someone who’s been paid a few thousands sitting across from you and drilling
answers out of you.” His hands move to my right ankle as he continues his gentle massage.
“What you need is a friend, someone to hold your hand and walk through this dark tunnel with you and I’m here to be that person.”
His hand comes up to cradle my face but I finch on instinct and his brows furrow, “I’m sorry Ares.. It’s just—”
“I know.” He chuckles and sits his ass down on the bare floor. “Do you remember the first time we met? You were so shy and no joke in this
world could crack a smile out of you.”
My head bobs stiffly as I nod at him and he smiles at me softly.
“I made it my life’s mission to get you to laugh or at least smile.” He throws his head back in laughter, muttering incoherent words under his breath. “After months of not making a single progress, I finally made the decision to give up my endeavors but one day changed everything. I remember making a silly joke in the lab and you got up and dashed out in such haste that got me worried that something might be wrong with you. I was so worried that I followed you only to find that you ran into the bathroom to laugh all by yourself. That warmed my heart a lot. The beginning of our unending friendship.”
The last part comes out as a small whisper, causing a tea
drop from my eyes.
Ares takes hold of both my hands. “I’m challenging myself again, Mirabella. I’m challenging myself to make you smile again even if you do it in secret but I want to see how long it takes before I have you tipping over in laughter.”
I take a deep breath, throwing my head back as my chest vibrates from my silent sob.
“Mirabella?” Ares whispers my name but I don’t have it in me to look at him. “I need you to know that you’re loved. That you have a lot of people who love you to the moon and back. That you have me. Please let me be there for you…please Mirabella.”
I’m unlovable.
I carry a whole lot of baggage
I’m a burden.
“You cannot be here Ares,” I choke out through my sob. “If Matteo finds out who you really are, you’ll be dead and I don’t think I can
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withstand the death of another loved one.”
Ares chuckles. “Don’t worry about me Mirabella, hmm? I have it all under control.” His hand shoots up to wipe my tears and this time, I don’t flinch. “Now might not be the right time M, but I have to let you know that our organization is growing rapidly. We’re sinking our claws deep
into the underworld.”
My heart’s palpitations become uneven, my interest peaking high. “Really? Tell me more.”
I appreciate the change in topic because the last thing I need right now is to wallow in my misery.
Ares takes his time, giving me details after details of our newly put together crime organization. He named it S.E.E.D, in other words Seed Because we have the one thing every single person in the underworld is dying to have.
The Seed.
And that combined with our knowledge of drugs has made us a shit ton of money in the past years..
I used to be hesitant about diving too deep into this blood ridden world but aher what it has stolen from me, I’m ready to go all in and make
myself known.
I’m ready to become that which they’ve succeeded in making me into.
A bloodthirsty monster.
“I heard that the people who did this to me belong with the Colombians.” I begin speaking, this time speaking from a place of rage. “We need to leave our mark, make people ask for and about us, so I’m ordering you to send a message to the Colombians. Make it loud and clear.”
Ares hums, “Matteo is already giving them hell but he doesn’t know about the Russians involvement in this. I’m taking Russia”
What?
What?!
“Are you insane? The Russians are dangerous!” I yell out.
“Of course they are but their men put hands on you and I’ll not stand aside and watch them get away with it.” He hisses. “And Mirabella?” We both lock eyes, “if you really want to leave your mark, you start playing with the big sharks.”
We both fall silent for minutes.
And more minutes.
More minutes of silence pass between us.
“Be careful Ares.” I say desperately and he hums with a nod. “I will be. You get better before I return, hmm?” His soft lips lingers on my temple before he stands to his full height and storms out of the studio.
Get better?
How possible is it to recover from this?
I can only hope.
